Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Whilst there waiting for my turn with the photo machine I happened upon a very nice old lady and her granddaughter. It was her son's birthday dinner. His birthday was actually last week but the dinner was that night. Her granddaughter and her son had just gotten back from a vacation to BC and Alberta and she was going to make her dad a collage. It actually wasn't her real father but her "dad". He was actually her step dad but they got on really well and her real father was a bit of a jerk. "They just love each other." She is a very good kid. Granddaughter comes over to show me the pictures - I recognize some of the places (makes me miss people) and we chat about slugs of unusual size and other things. She IS a very nice little girl. Back to the Grandmother while the rest of the granddaughter's pictures print... It is also her husband's 70th birthday. She used a picture of her husband from when he was 17 for the invites - he looked like Elvis... he doesn't really look like Elvis anymore. She is a lioness. She got the hall for a weekend night in December because of this - and because her neighbour is the head of it. It was supposed to be a surprise but her son in law let the cat out of the bag. So she ended up telling her husband that if he knew about it he might as well go buy a couple of cases of wine...She thinks I have a lovely smile. She misses her one year old granddaughter who lives in Windsor. She is looking forward to the holidays when she will see her. Her daughter is married to a school teacher. She wants to know if I am married. No - not anymore. Well all the better dear - now you can find your real love. Already have. Too bad because her nephew is just the handsomest devil and he has a fantastic job...She asked my advice on what to buy a one year old (knock-off purse of course) and we chatted about how much fun kids are at that age. She is shocked to find out I have two kids - and almost school age. She fusses over me. I hug her. She invites me to her husband's 70th birthday party. Sadly I am out of town. That's too bad because her nephew is going to be there, lol- have a wonderful Christmas Wallmart lady.
Next is the little old man who had no idea how to use the scanner. You go first little old man - you have less time on earth than I do....he is also there with his grandson. His grandson is 7. He is tall for his age. He likes Shrek and baseball. Little old man comes from a family of 8. His father died when he was very young and he quit school. His mother raised 8 children on $45.00 a month, $90.00 a month in the winter. He gets along well with all of his family and his nephew is in the army....
Oh - and thanks to Glugster for the award!! First x-mas gift I'd say!
Monday, November 26, 2007
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Here for your amusement is this year's Christmas list (part one - the first batch);
Great for travel. LMAO.
Pedestrian turn indicators. This is a great idea.
What? Replica of Breakfast at Tiffany's set. Every girl should have one for those lazy Sundays around the house...
I want to make hotdogs look like octopuses. Don't you? I would serve them at inappropriate times - like when the boss comes over for dinner.
This is actually something I am going to give to my ex in laws. (Maybe I will pair it with the hitler teapot...)
OOOH a Hoff poster... or even as a magnet. Okay... maybe not.
This is funny. Pure and simple. Great conversation piece this.
Fly swatter. Freakin love it.
Saturday, November 24, 2007
In Armenia, the traditional Christmas Eve meal consists of fried fish, lettuce and spinach. (Glad I'm not Armenian - bletch)
Artificial Christmas trees have outsold real ones since 1991. (Yep. I'm about ready to go back to cutting down a tree. Next year it's all about trekking into the spruce forest with hot coacoa and sawing down a tree...then immediately feeling guilty about it. I can hear trees scream. Such a curse.)
Friday, November 23, 2007
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Write a list of things of which you are suspicious. Any number of them will do. Even the number 0 works. This is the first meme that can be done without even doing it. In fact, you're doing it right now.
- Include the list of rules, if you feel like it.
- Link back to the person who tagged you. Or not.
- Tag however many people you want to tag. You can skip this step.
- If you acted on rule four, leave comments on their websites to let them know that they have been tagged. This step is also completely optional.
- Feel fantastic.
1. When I am at the tanning salon I am sure they hide cameras in the vents in the ceiling. There are probably naked pictures of me all over the net because of this.
2. People whom I don't know who are overtly friendly. Why? What do you want... where's my wallet? Who sent you?! Where's my tinfoil hat??!!
3. ANYONE who takes a job dressing up in those character costumes. (Barney, Chucky Cheese). This screams CREEPY.
4. Non fat desserts. This is too much of a dichotomy for my little brain to handle.
5. You know when you're at the grocery store and the same person just keeps passing you OVER AND OVER again. More than just a couple of times - even when you try to mess them up by going back over areas that you've already been together and shazzam - they appear again. They are spies for some religious cult - I'm convinced of it.
6. People who offer up their spot in a line up. Why? Did you hear the 100th shopper was going to win something? No thanks. I'll stay right here and continue reading the grocery store smut whilst I wait to win my free shopping spree.
7. People who breed earthworms in their basement. Seriously.
8. Anyone who hates Christmas. (Unless they don't celebrate it - then they are exempt). But really - there isn't a more feel good holiday in existence. If you hate Christmas you might as well hate Bambi and hot chocolate.
9. People who choose fruit and veggies without performing the squeeze and sniff tests. Might as well buy a car without test driving it.
10. Carnies. Small hands. Smell like cabbage.
Now I tag Badger Daddio, Earl, Kitty Kat, and Beth.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Speaking of snow...I also popped in to say that I am feeling oh so very Christmas-ey. It is in no doubt due in part to the carols playing on the radio and the decorations popping up everywhere. It's also because I am going to celebrate Christmas twice this year - and because I have already got the greatest gift I could have ever imagined. Truly. Yes, this - my friends - is a holiday season that I can say I am truly looking forward to the fast approach of. So, tonight as I happily find myself ensconced in my reindeer pj's and lay my head down to sleep I will be smiling and dreaming of sugar plums.... with mayhaps a wee touch of rum in them...what? Tis the season!
I also like that I can threaten misbehaving children with the old "Santa saw that" thing. I think, however, that I should stop threatening strangers children at the store... probably not such a good idea. Very effective though...
Friday, November 16, 2007
Anyways, while I was at this purse party there were some girls there I haven't met before. One of them somehow got onto the topic of micro chips being the mark of evil and how in the future we were all going to be microchipped at birth and no person who has one will be allowed into heaven... you see where this is going. I am not judgmental - really. But it was so hard not to ask her if she had a great big bowl of Crazyios for breaky. I was biting my tongue the entire night. Then she actually went on to explain something about how in the year 2012 (I think that was the year, maybe I should have written it down) the world was going to end. At that point I said - shit. I'd better go buy some more purses while I have the chance. Big purses. (To hold all my shoes - since I'm totally bringing them with me into space right before the world implodes.)
In fact - if the world really was ending in 5 years - there's a lot of things I'd be doing right now and I'm pretty sure none of them would help get me into heaven.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
I have learned to Fox Trot.
I have consumed some of the most delicious red wine this week! I've never felt better. I have laughed so much that as I sit here typing this my tummy hurts. *Yay!* I have also met some incredible and wonderful new friends... but the leaving makes my heart hurt. What an adventure. I also ate some really yum food and fell - if possible - more in love every moment I spent with Spartan. Not a bad feeling - that.
I have also learned that it IS possible to outrun a police car ;-)
So, now I am going to drag my but home and crawl into bed to sleep. Until next week. :-D
Tomorrow is Kat's birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I think we may need to consume a beverage in celebratory fashion. There goes detox.....just kidding... I'm a lightweight in reality.
Thursday, November 08, 2007
Thursday, November 01, 2007
Going to my other home 2702.32 miles away - if I were driving. But instead of 40 hours driving it will be a mere 5 by plane. Hooray. But if I had to, I'd walk.
So I will still be posting but it might be a little sporadic.
I will leave you with this... it reminds me of the time my parents and I were drunk somewhere in the BVIs and my Dad swore he heard Danny Boy on the steel drums somewhere on one of the islands...