Friday, June 08, 2007

Finally - A New Post

I have been remiss in my blogging duties as of late and for that I am truly sorry.... well kind of... anyways....

Frodo the Frog has escaped. It has been a month. I do not hold out any hope of finding the little fellow at this point. There is a good chance that there is a little beef jerky styled fire bellied toad
somewhere in my upstairs bathroom. I will miss Frodo.

Oh Frodo.

You were a toad
You liked to eat crickets,
liked your little abode

So I thought.

Till you escaped one night
and never came home
You’re not really that bright.

This I know.

So juicy and yummy
I had so many crickets
To fill your fired tummy.

But you left.

Now I have an empty home
sitting on a shelf
with no toad to call its own.

Goodbye Frodo.

Over and above that - a funny little story about a skunk. The other day our neighbour pops his head over the fence and in his Russian accent asks;
"Uhhh. You know anything ‘bout da skunk?"
"Um. I know they tend to be stinky from one end more than most. Why?" (turn to look)

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. WTF?

Standing there is Frank - resplendent is his garden boots and hat displaying a cage and inside said cage a wee skunk. The skunk did not appear to be amused. Frank, on the other hand, appeared not only to be quite proud of himself for catching him but also rather smitten with the little fellow. He was sure that the skunk was also rather fond of him since it was accepting the odd table scrap from him (but failed to notice that the second it snatched the food it aimed it’s "stinky end" in Frank’s general direction)
"Frank, this might appear to be just a baby, but it can still spray."
"You think?"
(then in the background from his wife... "OF COURSE IT CAN SPRAY. IDIOT. IT’S A GUNK. GUNK’S SPRAY - SWAT THEY DO....idiot.")
Frank turns and grins, "She crazy. Thyroid."
Umhummm. Not YOU that’s crazy Frank. That’s obvious.
***
This was several days ago. The area around our house smells like a "GUNK" exploded but Frank insists it wasn’t HIS skunk - it was someone elses’. Riiiiight. I also overheard him explaining to Mary that he intended to keep the GUNK as a pet. This should be interesting.

7 comments:

B.E. Earl said...

You cannot, CANNOT, keep a skunk as a pet. Very, very bad idea.

Now, I do know someone who kept a raccoon as a pet. It lived on his boat and it would follow him around the marina and beach. It was disgusting.

Kat said...

I predict Abby won't be playing outside as much anymore. I also see lots of tomato juice in your near future.

elizabeth said...

Earl. Uh huhm. Very bad idea indeed.

Kath - YOU are the oracle. LMAO. I'm sure this will be an interesting summer. (Wanna come over and play?)

Mark said...

Ode to a Toad.

I like it!

Sorry to hear about Frodo, though...

Green Fish said...

"She crazy. Thyroid."---fucking gold man. You tell him to keep his gunk and keep it real as well.

Joe the Troll said...

Don't give up on Frodo yet. I had a snake disappear for several months before reappearing.

Kat said...

I think the skunk ate him.