Thursday, March 12, 2009

Girl Power

A post about Barbies, Bratz, Miss America, my little ponies and heels... you boys'll love it!

Barbies are dolls. They are to be played with. Nobody has ever figured out what a Bratz doll would look like in life size with the same proportions - ...or maybe they have... - my guess is that it would have a rather difficult time supporting its ginormous head.

I recently read an article somewhere tearing apart Mattel for selling barbies. The article took the stance that Barbies are responsible for setting unrealistic expectations on our bodies growing up. I don't know about you ladies - but Barbie? Nooo. That's more the ex-husband dept of Toys r Us. Barbie - ahhh Barbie. She was great for having imaginary weddings (with Ken - the looooove of her life - sigh - who always told her she was beautiful... just like Spartan does), making her hair into ratty yet original styles, re-enacting an argument with your BFF (just last year***) coloring allover with marker and for bossing about in general - I also noticed that they are very aerodynamic when launched at my older brother feet first. Girls have launched them at their older brother's for more than half a decade. Why would they stop now?

Stop blaming a plastic toy. I get that Hollywood places unrealistic expectations that women sometimes feel pressure to emulate. Miss America? Same thing. But as long as the world is turning - they will have plastic dolls with long legs, teeeensy waists and big boobs AND they will have some kind of pageant awarding women for something that they had very little to do with - genetics and hair spray. Don't get me wrong; some of these ladies are very committed to healthy living and to working out - and god knows I get how hard that can be since I work my ass off - some have even demonstrated some impressive levels of academia... but mostly people - they are there because they have mastered the most important skills of all; teasing their hair, putting just the right amount of Vaseline on their teeth and knowing which heels will really set that bikini off... (who actually wears heels with their bikini? I might start. Hell - I might even swim in them... maybe even jogging.). I still watch the shite. I still play with buy Barbies (for my daughter...) Can't help it. And really - it's kind of the fault of the mass populous that this still goes on - we're just a bunch of critical enablers.

My point is - I think blaming Mattel for poor body image makes about as much sense as blaming a toy company because you couldn't find a real pink pony with wings. Unless someone actually has... in that case - I want one too...

*** who out there hasn't made your Barbies beat the crap out of each other? Come on! You pick em up and they start beating on each other - with mostly their heads until they are basically a great pile of messy hair and limbs that are attached at rather unnatural angles by the time your mom calls you for dinner. Sometimes their heads even pop right off and roll under the bed - seemingly lost forever. Until one day you move and you find it under the bed and there is a spider living inside it and then you are traumatized - and then you have to check inside the heads of all barbies everywhere to ensure they too haven't become an arachnid haven... I got a little side tracked there. Have a lovely Friday ;0)

10 comments:

badgerdaddy said...

Holy shit, I just noticed you're getting married on my birthday. Great choice!

McBöbø said...

Yeah, Barbie is cool. But Action Man! Oh My God, how will I ever be able to scuba dive, para-sail, carry large calibre semi-automatic weaponry and wear combat fatigues accessorised with daggers and grenades - all without a meat and two veg?

Talk about unrealistic images for men!

sprinkle4 said...

All I know is that when I used to "style" my Barbies' hair, I used to take their heads off to make it easier. If only you could do that with kids!

Donn Coppens said...

My sister's Barbies & Skippers were always nekked and they were real tramps.

They made out with with all of my GI Joes (even the Nazis!) plus my Captain Action and Johnny West.

Hullaballoo said...

You are preaching to the converted here my dear. I can play with a Barbie without getting upset that I don't look like her. I enjoy here plastic perfection, impossibly long hair slutty heels and great girly social life, because it's fun.

Yes, I bought myself Barbies to play with, BECAUSE I have boy children lol.

elizabeth said...

Badge! Where have you been hiding?

Mcbobo - zactly. Whatever you do - don't try to emulate a popple.

Sprinkle - LMAO!!! How true!

Donn - Hussies. The lot of them.

Hulla - all the more reason to find you adorable. Wish we could get together and play barbies!

Slyde said...

i think it should be law for ALL women to have to wear heels and bikinis...

nice high stappy sandals.... YAY!

white rabbit said...

A Tony Blair doll could be made...

And called 'My Little Tony'

And then people of goodwill could do beastly things to it ;)

Real Live Lesbian said...

Great post. My Barbies lived in a shoebox in the closet. Still do. Oh, and they're all naked. I think that speaks volumes about me.

Callie said...

You know - I don't think Slyde would want that after seeing me in a bikini and heels. My husband is still trying to recover . . .

I'm one of the weird mommy's who try to force her kids to want the Barbie's with dark hair, because "dark hair is so much prettier than that yellow stuff". Needless to say, it just makes my babies want the blond dollies all the more. *sigh*

Oh, and put me on the list for a pink pony, too.