(these are from why women are single email from a friend...)
Hi, my name is Willie. I enjoy sheep *awkwardly long pause*, fine dining and administering enemas. I have been told that my stellar physical appearance is intimidating. I think a perfect first date would be exploring our chemisty by putting firecrackers in frog's mouths and watching the splatter pattern - there is much to be said for that - like reading tea leaves... only much louder. I enjoy sheep. *seems to go off into his own realm for a spell* I work part time as a super hero and am also a secret agent for the FRO office. That is all I can tell you - it is *TOP* secret. Sheeeeep. In a past life I was a rubber tree and I was.... green.
What's happening ladiez? My name is Hugo. I call my body guard (to the left) Stecki La Gambe - his real name is Stan. I am one badass dude. *flexes* I like my ladies mean. I dated Brigette Neilson for a spell - but she wasn't mean enough. *growls* I worked as a fruit picker and also as a chicken catcher and a but am currently unemployed. My ambition is to start a rock band that only wears rubber cloggs (you know the ones). ROCK ON! I live with my Mom in a kick ass trailer all it needs is...you (and some curtains) to make it perfect! My life is a dramady - won't you be my muse?
Hey Sweet Tart. My name is Leeeroy. I'm a shy guy. Won't you complete my McHappy Meal? Let's take a trip "around the world". I like to dress as a Zebra and run around my water bed while you try to catch me. Dunnit sound like fun? *stops to make sexy eyes* Let me rub you down with my strong man hands and show you what it feels like to be...tied...ahem I mean put upon a pedistal. My star sign is Gemini but I have more than one personality - all of them sexy. *winks* I am waiting to hear from you - but please hurry so I can dance sexy for you and make sweet lurve to you all night long *all night* all night long *all night* yeah.