Friday, July 11, 2008

The other day my Mother took my Grandmother out shopping and then returned to her house with her for a cup of tea. Nan always has a cup of tea. Always. She is the cutest woman in the entire universe.
She sits down with her cup of tea and flips on Jerry Springer. The topic was S & M. My nan is 82. She wondered how much more she might have missed in those 82 years after seeing this. She keeps turning to my Mother and saying. "WHAT is she doing to him, dear?"
My Mother would reply, "Well Mom, she's whipping him."
"What?"
"A whip mom."
Nanny; "And he likes that dear?"
My Mother; "It appears so, Mom." and then laughing her ass off.
There are also puppets on the stage - like stuffed people about a foot tall... she was wondering if those were real. Then there was the man with no legs and what appears to be only half of his abdomen - she will spend the rest of her life - tea in hand - trying to figure out how he uses the toilet...

9 comments:

Verdant Earl said...

It's better to keep some people sheltered from Jerry Springer.

I wish I could be one of those people.

Verdant Earl said...

Liz, I just saw this video and I thought of you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iOOQIXW67w0

It's our little, um, friend again. Enjoy the nightmares!

elizabeth said...

Oh. Why did I go there? I should have known better. I'm damaged now.

Callie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Callie said...

Damn - but I can't type worth crap today. I deleted my previous comment due to all the typos!

I'm going to have to check out the link when I get home. Work doesn't allow You Tube.

And I love little old ladies like your grandmother!! They're so cute!

My grandmother was never 'cute'. Remember the "where's the beef" lady? That was like my grandmother. Tough old broad. I always wanted a cute grandmother.

I'm jealous now.

:-D

Verdant Earl said...

You are most welcome. ;)

Anonymous said...

Elizabeth, you are so funny, you crack me up. What a fabulous story lol lol. I can just picture the scene and the look of abject confusion on the old dear's face. Priceless. Oh to have such a cutie granny.

H
xx

Stace said...

I wish I had an awesome grandmother, instead of a crazy one!

Slyde said...

wondering how he used the toilet would have been the FIRST thing i thought about as well.. your grammy rocks!