Sunday, December 02, 2007

I am not paranoid, and I am not delusional... but yesterday I was on the phone with Spartan. He was making soup.

He poses the question "Should I eat the soup if it's expired?"
I'm like, "Well, HOW expired? And...what kind of soup?"
"Tomato, March 2007."
"Does the can look bloated?"
"Uh. Nope."
"Right, well. If it's tomato it should be fine."

Like what kind of soup matters and really, an expiry date is an expiry date when all things are considered. But it just seemed that it should be fine. You know - logically. How many times have we consumed a can of soup without even looking to see if it was past it's date? It's not like yogurt!! It's sealed. In a can.

Anyways, after I proffered my advice upon him rather carelessly - I didn't think much about it again. But when I fell asleep - I had a nightmare that it made him really sick. Obviously my subconscious self was appalled at my conscious self. It was terrible. Awful. AND all my fault.

So this morning I set about doing some research and you will all be very relieved to find that this is why they attach an expiry date;

"The date code displayed on our products is a best used by date. This means that in order to experience optimal color, flavor, aroma and texture the product should be consumed prior to the end of the month displayed on the product. For example, in order to experience optimal quality a product with a date code that reads JUN07 or JUN2007 should be consumed prior to the end of June of the year 2007."

Okay - so really I had nightmares that he got sick and almost died but really the worst thing that could have happened is that the soup wouldn't be the "perfect" red colour. (They just want you to throw it out and buy more. Scammers.)

At first I was all filled up with relief - but...I'm a little pissed at Campbell's right now. Grrrrr. SOMEONE MIGHT GET A LETTER.

Anyways - you may consider this information useless but - at least if a loved one asks you and you say the same thing I did - you won't be riddled with terrible nightmares as a result.

In other news;
It snowed here last night. A LOT. The neighbour is snow blowing the sidewalk because he is a nice little elf. Obviously I haven't been watching the weather channel as religiously as usual because I didn't know that it was going to snow. I feel it is almost a personal insult that I was unaware. Can't really explain that.

Well, I'm off to find my snowshoes. (They are very fashionable; I took a bedazzler to them last year... they sparkle like diamonds ....). I'm kidding. I don't really have a pair. But if I did - I would bedazzle them all to hell...


Kat said...

I'll call you soon...just as soon as by stooopid phone stops beeping. I think I need a new one. Shut up. I know I do.
btw that is a complete scam cause as far as I ever knew cans don't expire. That's why we stock them for emergencies. Misleading misleaderers.I knew I didn't trust those rosy faced, chubby soup guzzling kids.

B.E. Earl said...

It snowed here today as well, but really it was just an annoyance at only about an inch or so. Cold as hell, though. I hate winter.

On the plus side, I've heard that Campbell's Tomato Soup gets better with age. Like a fine wine.

PS - I've really not heard that.

John said...

Following on from b.e. earl's comment above, I'd just like to say that I was most curious as to his proclamations of fine ageing and so I took a bottle of wine and a can of Campbell's tomato soup, opened them both and sat them here on my desk for a period of 22 hours.

Upon returning 5 minutes ago I sampled the entirety of both products and I can categorically state that I feel very ill, and very pissed.

But not too sure why I did this or what the result is.*

*I've not really done this.


elizabeth said...

Kat - Evil little cherubs.

Earl - I hate winter too. Bah humbug winter. But not Christmas!

John - I'm glad to hear you've NOT done this. I was a little concerned... but then it got me thinking maybe you would make a good funnygirl tester of theories?