Sunday, October 07, 2007

(Are you guys scared away by the comment moderation or what??)

Here for your reading pleasure is a list of small (and large things) that magically happen in my daydreams:

1. I can actually fly. Not with wings. Nope. With the invisible inner tube that I used to dream I had when I was a kid. It enables me to soar through the air not unlike Superman. The problem was, whenever I took it off to land I would lose it. (it was invisible afterall).

2. I have a cottage somewhere on an island up on a hill. And around the outside of said cottage is a porch complete with several swings and wicker tea caddies. Also, there is a white horse with a grey muzzle that runs around in a field of long flowing grass that surrounds me. Everything is whitewashed and there are more windows than walls - all of which open wide allowing long white curtains to flutter in the - always present - gentle breeze. I go there on weekends and paint things. These paintings are always flawless and one day will hang in a museum. There are no bugs there ever. Especially spiders. (Perhaps I fly there with my invisible inner tube...)

3. I have the ability to fix things around the house, such as you know - levelling things and maybe do some plumbing. This obviously lacks the same quality of unrealism as the first two fantasies, but it is unlikely enough.

4. I nonchalantly use a Bewitched type wiggle of my nose or light saber to perform common household tasks.

5. I learn to sing Opera. This is about as likely as number 4.

6. I have the ability to freeze screaming children (medusa style) and remove myself from their company instantly. They are then delivered directly to my ex in laws house - when there are about 30 of them - they thaw instantaneously (or sometimes at exactly the stroke of midnight). (I am flawed, this I know).

7. I reach the age of 100 and then start aging backwards like Mork in Mork & Mindy.

And you?

18 comments:

elizabeth said...

This is funny - I was just looking at my statcounter and someone from Sheffield England googled "How do I get Michele into bed" and somehow landed on my blog. LMAO. Wonder if he found his answer...

Verdant Earl said...

That could have been a whole new post for you. Way to comment-blog!

By the way, the way that Superman flies is actually impossible. He has no obvious means of acceleration or locomotion.

I believe I've blogged about this.

elizabeth said...

Ermerm - Earl? It was a daydream post...

besides - if the dude is Superman THAT is his means of acceleration. He just - you know -goes. Cuz he's Superman...

elizabeth said...

He might just have an invisible acceleratory (word?) inner tube. Yeah. That's it.

Kat said...

We didn't even read this. Just drunk in Pacifica and thought we'd check in Muaawwwwhahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!

Kat said...

We didn't even read this. Just drunk in Pacifica and thought we'd check in Muaawwwwhahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!

Kat said...

Since when do you have blog owner approval on here???? Or did I have to read something to know this...cause I'm too drunk to read right now...

elizabeth said...

Really? Yer Drunk?! SHOCKING!! I wish I knew you had access to a computer - did everything get worked out at the restaurant? (She won't even read this...lol)

elizabeth said...

(the manager was supposed to contact you directly at your hotel...;-)

Anonymous said...

I agree - Superman is who he is and to question his abilities is to limit your own pursuit of dreams and happiness - you have a nice dream going - keep on soaring!

elizabeth said...

Thanks Richard and welcome to da blog. Your comment made me giggle.

elizabeth said...

and my feet haven't hit the earth in months... ;-)

Slyde said...

That mork and mindy thing always pissed me off...

they said he aged backwards, but then in the later seasons they had the jonathan winters baby, and as each season went on they just looked older, not younger...

i remember a little 10 year old me being really pissed off at that..

elizabeth said...

Yeah well I was pissed off that I couldn't drink my oj with my finger.

Verdant Earl said...

Wow...this guy must be something.

He must be related to me! ;)

elizabeth said...

Which guy?

Verdant Earl said...

The guy who has made your feet not touch the earth in months.

Sorry that the comment was out of order. Comment moderation will make that happen.

elizabeth said...

Earl - I thought you meant superman... lol. Yes, he's quite something. Though - I don't think he's ever worn a wizard costume... ;-P