Last night around 10:00 I was watching a movie (not so good - Derailed). Sitting on the couch out of the corner of my eye I see - a horse running through the back yard. Surely it was a horse - what other than a horse is that big or runs that fast? I look - I look again - and I rub my eyes. A dog? Mother of god it is a dog. The biggest dog I've ever seen! I had some suspicion that this might be the dog belonging to the girl who moved into the church mance at the end of the street. The same girl who has let her lawn turn into a field. (I'll get her for that later - actually thought I might mow a message into her lawn - what say you blogfriends?) So I get a stick and head towards the house. Meanwhile - the dog hears me and decides to taunt me on my journey. I swear I could him uttering "yummy yummy in my tummy" at me. After some silly "hiding in the neighbours yard" antics and trying to sound authoritative "YOU GO HOME!" - I reached her door.
She's maybe 19. Talking on the like oh my god phone to her totally wicked friends. She laughed and flipped her hair. This is the third time he has totally gotten away. And she just can't figure out how (!) Um - okay dipshit. Maybe you could try a dogpen. Or maybe a collar that actually fits since he slipped his gigantic teeth ridden head right out of it - really have no idea how she could have gotten one TOO BIG for this dog - it is HUGE. Or - keep the f-ing mammoth inside your house. Since it might eat the children as scooby snacks if it gets away during the day. STUPID people.